Male Stages of Life

AGE	DRINK
17	beer
25	bourbon
35	vodka
48	double vodka
66	Maalox
	SEDUCTION LINE
17	"My parents are away for the weekend."
25	"My girlfriend is away for the weekend."
35	"My fiancee is away for the weekend."
48	"My wife is away for the weekend."
66	"My second wife is dead."
	FAVORITE SPORT
17	sex
25	sex
35	sex
48	sex
66	napping
	DEFINITION OF A SUCCESSFUL DATE
17	tongue
25	breakfast
35	She didn't set back my therapy
48	I didn't have to meet her kids
66	Got home alive
	FAVORITE FANTASY
17	third base
25	airplane sex
35	menage a trois
48	taking the company public
66	Swiss maid/Nazi love slave
	THE IDEAL AGE TO GET MARRIED
17	25
25	35
35	48
48	66
66	17
	IDEAL DATE
17	Triple Stephen King feature at the drive-in
25	Split the check before we go back to my place
35	Just come over.
48	Just come over and cook.
66	Sex in the company jet on the way to Vegas